Kirksville, MO...ahhh the memories!

Why is it that when I drive into this town, tons of memories flood my mind. I only dated the "farmboy" for a few months....yet I can't help but think of him as I make this journey. God had a perfect plan and of course I'm overjoyed that he led me to JoeDel and we have a beautiful baby girl. The farmboy was, however, what I would probably consider my very "first love" Of course I had infatuations, crushes and even relationships before him...but none as serious as we were. We talked about seriously about marriage, jobs, kids, etc. That was a first for me that is for sure...Dating him led me to an array of many "firsts" actually, along with some regrets and such. After that relationship ended, my life really turned in circles but led me right here to where I am right now...which is in a motel room far away from home missing my husband and baby girl!!!!

I'm so tired tonight. It's 8:30 and I'm getting ready to hit the bed I think. I have a ton of work I need to stay up and do...but right now food really sounds like a much better option.

Oh and i also started my new diet today. I did really well for the most part, but dieting on the road is HARD! I did great until supper, where I indulged in the salad bar at ruby tuesdays, along with a couple of mini turkey burgers and a few (ouch) french fries!! I got full really fast though, thankfully, so it wasnt too bad.

Ok seriously im going to bed now!

remembering

Why is it that a silly eposide of sex and the city can take you back in an instant.

I'm on season 2 right now...and Big just took carrie out in public and called her his girlfriend...something he'd never done before but she, of course, loved. He was right there where she'd been dreaming that he'd be for some time. I remember feeling like that once. I remember dreaming and wishing of a night that I figured would NEVER happen and then one night BOOM he turned into the romantic schmuck I had been wishing for. Obviously that was a true cinderella night as it only occured ONCE in my life, just like it didnt really last for Carrie either. Just like that, Big turns back into a whatever he is. Carrie is stupid, she breaks a date with her Best Friend for the guy b/c he wanted to cook her supper...and good ole Miranda sets her in her place when she says "Your relationship is JUST LIKE it always was, IT IS ALL ABOUT HIM." Duh!

I'm headed out of town tomorrow night. I'm trying to get this dang movie done for the HMS Christmas party....but Its getting late and I think I'm goin to have to hit the bed soon. I did get most of my christmas decorations up tonight though! WHOOO HOOO. Here's the tree...

nevermind!

Well I found them. Thank you LORD!!!!!

I went out as soon as the dark faded away this morning in search of them once again in my storage shed. After moving around several trash bags and such, there was one loan shoebox on the floor of the storage shed...and low and behold THERE THEY WERE. I was just so excited I started jumping up and down and went to run back in the house...fell in a hole....got back up and realized this was just the way it was supposed to be. Now I know how much they REALLY mean to me and how thankful I am that i have them again in my posession.


I got to work this morning (late as usual) only to get a call saying my dog was out and chasing cars. Argh. SO, back into town I go....with the bubble flying at speeds I didn't know it could go anymore. Sudden flashbacks of those high school days traveling to school with the pedal floored. Oh good times. I seriously got that thing up to past 90 today....and it felt great!!!!!

Anyway, I'm back to work....and sure that other obstacles will come my way but I will deal with them as they come I suppose.

Only the good Lord knows...

Ok all I need your help in a serious way.

I need you to pray for me. This is a totally random prayer request...but I have lost some VERY special Christmas ornaments. Well, all of the "Really Special Ornaments" you put together in a special place b/c you never want anything to happen to them. Yeah, they're gone. i've looked everywhere. JoeDel and I have had a big huge blowout fight. This has not been a good night and sometimes I cant help but to thnk maybe this is a "sign" that I dont need all of those special ornaments anymore anyway b/c JoeDel and I can never make it? Am I crazy? I just REALLY want to find these and I'm asking you guys to help pray that God will lead me to them before I blow a gasket.

Thanks.

Back to Life, Back to Reality...

I'm sure thats how most of the world feels after the Thanksgiving holiday. Our holiday was fun. We started the weekened off with a child-free night out. Avery stayed with Mary so JoeDel and I went up to our "local pub" for a few drinks. It was a fun time.

Thursday we did the whole Turkey dinner and afternoon card games/football watching. Friday mom and I went SHOPPING early while Daddy babysat. I had to "work" Friday so I had to drag mom along to Derailed in Joplin and the Carpet Barn in Springfield. It was a nice drive but I was ready to get home to my baby girl!

We should be hanging our Christmas lights soon. No promises on how this will turn out folks. This is JoeDel's project so who knows what we have in store. I got our tree up yesterday...and, so far, Avery has not pulled it down on her yet. She did roll out of bed on Friday night though....scary but I think she is just fine.

Thats all I've got.

Is it really any wonder...

that i weigh like 900 lbs? Let me just tell you why. I just ate TWO krispy kremes. Not one but TWO. Argh. And they were so good but not good enough to justify the massive amount of mass that my body is currently made up of.

Oh well, as I complain about the krispy kremes, I am looking forward to my lunch...and then a few hours after that I will look forward to supper....and it is an awful cycle that consumes me. Oh well, my diet this week, thursday is thanksgiving!!!!!!

I really dont have a lot going on. We are getting ready for thanksgiving...we had our first dinner here at work yesterday. yum! Avery is still growing like crazy. She is just so cute and I am starting to get excited for her first christmas!!!!

ARGH !!! I HATE CASINOS!!!

Am I on a fast track to being a gambling addict? It sort of seems that way....but man I suck lately. I lost last weekend...tonight I decided to stay at the casino north of topeka and try my luck. My room is awesome!! Plasma TV on the wall, contemporary dresser w/ granite top...it is just REALLY nice. Good thing my room is free (compliments of HMS) b/c my night has not been good. I went down and ate (another freebie) the Buffet on the company...then I bought a beer ($2.50) lost $10 REAL fast in a quarter machine. Lost another $10 pretty fast in a PENNY machine....then lost $2 on the "hundred or nothing" game. Thats a grand total of $24.50 lost tonight. I hate casinos.

I do, however, love thrift stores. I never go anymore and today I decided I needed to start again. Our old manager of the Manhattan store opened her own thrift store and I went to visit her today while I was in town. She showed me over to the rack of brand new plus size clothes from lane bryant that someone had brought in. The clothes were $2.00 each and most of them still had tags on them! SWEEETTTTTTT. I spent like $25 bucks there too but look how much I came out w/ as opposed to this dang casino. Maybe I will just say the clothes cost me $50 and then I wont feel quite so bad. ha.

I hate being away from my family. Its only 8:00 and I"m ready to go to bed bc I miss JoeDel and Avery so much.

Oh, you will all enjoy this. I was VERY tempted to buy a pack of cigs tonight for $5.00 in a machine, but I opted to gamble that $5 away and not smoke tonight. Argh, I wish I would have just smoked.

I'm the biggest loser!

Yeah so I wish we were talking about weight, but unfortunately I'm talking about the CASINO. Yesterday JoeDel and I went down to the campground at the Lake. We were really surprised when we pulled in and Leonard's RV was moved from his space up by the road. Gary (a guy that lives down at the campground and takes care of things) had got it running and moved it up by his camper to work on it. I think it was a huge blessing for us that it was already moved when we got there. JoeDel did really well though. I knew going to the lake would be hard for him but he didn't show it at all. We got the camper all ready for winter, hung out w/ the fine folks that were down there for the weekend, then headed into town. After a great dinner at a mexican joint, we headed to Grand Lake Casino.

I sucked.

JoeDel did pretty well...he walked out $5 ahead of when he went in....and I came out about $30 down. So, not a huge loss but still it is no fun when I lose and he wins. We played for a LONNNGGG time though...we were there at least 2 1/2 hours so I guess thats not too bad.

We got a lot done today. I cleaned the living room and I mean CLEANED down to the nitty gritty. It needed it. Now we are watching the Nascar race which is about over. ONE MORE race next week and the season is over. boo hoo.

So Avery is sick AGAIN. She has 2 ear infections and strep throat. But, she is in really good spirits and the only reason I took her to the dr was b/c I was afraid she was getting pneumonia, never suspected the others.

Thats all for now.

:)

The right choice?

How do you tell someone how to live their lives? The truth is you can't. The truth is that sometimes you have to sit back and watch people live their lives and will either be a) pleasantly surprised at the outcome you never saw coming or b) sitting there when all is said and done with a big "i knew this would happen" smirk.

I have had lots of people in my life try to warn me of things I was doing wrong, but I ignored them. I made my own decisions and most of the time wished I would have listened a little closer or thought things through...but the truth is also that I'm still here, still happy, and better off than ever. Life truly is a "broken road" but God has a perfect plan for our lives. Sometimes those plans involve a lot of heartbreak and drama..

Once I had a friend that ran off and got married to a man after not dating him for very long at all. I didnt think it was wise, but for awhile it seemed to work just fine....until she realized she never REALLY new the man she married and is now going through a really messy divorce...as a single mom of a precious little 2 year old. I could sit here and think "i told you so" but yet as a result of her being back where she is right now, she has met an amazing man who is everything she has prayed for. So, who am I to say she made a mistake? Obviously this was the plan for her life.

I guess I just have to sit here and think about these sorts of instances while I bite my tongue about others.

So JoeDel and I are planning a trip to the casino tomorrow afternoon. Hope we win big! Happy Weekend ya'll!